the Malay's wedding is wasting of money,energy and time?

Malay's bride

Ok , actually today I'm done with my public speaking for my BEL class . It is quite tough since I need to talk in front of the people , some kind of activity that I've never done for a quite long time . huhu . since I've left my secondary school , so , I'm not even take part in any competition in part of debate , forum or public speaking in this university . Quite poor . hee ~

About the title , well , I'm totally disagree with that statement . The reasons ? Yeah , when we are arguing about something , we should have the reasons , right ? So , actually , in my own opinion , I think that Malay's customs are unique . It just showing that Malay's customs are very unique compared to others . As the simple example , in Malay's wedding , before the wedding ceremony , they have adat merisik . This is about the male side , presented by the male's family , will come or visit the female's family . In this custom , the should getting know to each other , and the important of this custom is to know whether the female is still available or not .

After all , it will follow by the custom called bertunang . In this custom , it means that the couple is agree to be together . So , the female will be given a ring called as cincin belah rotan as a sign of the agree to be the partner for the male . During this custom , they will decide the date , day and how the wedding ceremony will be . For the period of time , they have their time to prepare for their wedding ceremony .

cincin belah rotan 

Well , in Malay's custom , the preparation for wedding ceremony are most will be handled by the male's side . This is because , before marriage , the male should be prepared well in case of money , especially . He should prepare for hantaran and mas kahwin for his future wife . This is as a sign to show that the male is responsible enough to manage and handle his future wife and also his marriage , soon . In other word , it is also as the present or souvenier for the wife as she is willing to be his wife .

So , in my opinion , I totally disagree that Malay's wedding are wasting . This is because , this show the unique of the Malay's custom and as a sign that marriage is not a simple thing . Marriage is about a responsible and serious thing . A future husband should know his responsible to his wife and same goes to the future wife . Well , maybe , for the bride , it looks like a wasting in case to get money for the ceremony . But , we must remember and realize that nowadays , everything that we want to do in this life , use money . Like sayings , no money , no talk . So , it should'nt be an issue when it involve about marriage , we are talking about waste of money .

Besides , I also disagree that Malay's wedding is wasting of time . This is because , I think we should consider in case to spent time to arrange the ceremony well . The marriage is once for the whole of life . So , why don't we just spent some of time , to make it special and memorable for the whole of our life . It wouldn't be waste , but I'm sure , it will be the sweetest memory in our life .

So , it's not a waste for wedding . It's not for others , but for our own self . =)

Money VS Love

Heee ~ love or money ? money or love ?? which one do you prefer ? lol ..

Ok , bila sentuh isu nieyh , aku mmg suke suke suke ... =))

Apa ? ye , aku suke duit . ada org x suke duit ke ?? pelik kott .. huhu

Well , nowadays , money is everything , okey ? no money , no talk , no action . muahaha ..

Bila ckp pasal love is cinta nieyh , for sure ia sgt sinonim a.k.a familiar to all of us . nvm lah kn ,

even bebudak sekolah rendah skrg pun noe , what love is .. hekhek . jgn nk ketinggalan zaman sgt kalau

ada yg mengaku tak kenal what the love is ?? huhu . what the hell is this .. huuu ~

So , just some opinion yg aku rasa based utk aku sendiri lah , kn . apa yg aku fikir .

lain org , lain pemikirannya . =)

i prefer this .. =))

Well , love or money . For sure aku akan lebih berat sebelah  pilih duit . sebab ? sebab nyer , aku ulang sekali lagi , no money , no no talk , no action , no love too . heee ~ mata duitan kau perempuan . ahaha . it's up to masing2 lah kan cara nak pikir . kenapa aku prefer lebih utk duit ?

First thing first , aku rasa hidup dlm zmn skrg nieyh , mmg tak akan lengkap tanpa adanya duit .

even nak masuk toilet skrg nieyh pun , kena bayar dulu oii ... huhu ~ mmg haru lah kan . tak dak duit pakai buang hajat tu tepi jalan lah jwbnya . huhu . see .. btapa pentingnya duit . 

buy this one with money

Duit boleh beli mcm2 . ada duit , semua boleh duit . org ckp , money is everything la skrg nieyh . huhu .

duit mmg berkuasa weyh . even nak beli org pun , kau mampu kalau kau ada duit . hee ~ 

Bkn lah cinta tu x penting . tapi , cuba tgk zaman skrg nieyh ye . nak belajar pun kena ada duit . nak kawin lagi lah kan . hantaran nyer saje dah beribu ribu , persiapan itu , ini , kenduri kendara . huhu . mmg kena guna duit . laen la artis , org sponsor tu , sponsor ini . hee ~

the another point , aku rasa duit tu lebih penting dari cinta kalau zmn mcm skrg nieyh . even duit , kita guna , habis . tapi , kita cari , bertambah lah kn . kita simpan , masa depan senang . tapi , cinta ? berubah mengikut masa . cinta tu mmg tak ternilai , tapi sukar dinilai . cinta kdg2 menyakitkan hati . huhu . so , duit lebih memberi kepuasan . 

cinta mmg x boleh dibeli tapi , ada je duit , cinta tu kdg2 mampu dibeli . see? power of money . human become blind when talking about money . huhu . dunia dunia . tmbahan pulak , zmn skrg nieyh , nk cari cinta yg btl btl cinta tu bkn lah senang . depends on us . mcm mana kita menilai cinta tu . 

Kahwin Awal .. kebaikan atau keburukan ?

Entah kenapa terasa nak menulis tentang tajuk nieyh . Maybe , sbb assignment utk subjek Critical Thinking , aku dapat task nieyh utk dilaksanakan . huhu . So, just make some research by surfing the internet . Mcm mcm pandangan dan pendapat yg org utarakan . Tetapi , walau apa pun pandangan org , mmg diakui setiap perkara tu akan wujud pra dan kontranya .

Sentuh tentang isu kahwin awal or muda nieyh , rasanya dah jadi semacam satu trend pulak . Ada jugak terdengar cerita daripada kawan kawan , yg belum habis belajar lagi , dah pun berkahwin . even my lecturer , dia sendiri ceritakan pengalaman dia berkahwin semasa masih di tahun 2 Ijazah .  Alhamdulillah , sampai sekarang bahagia dan dah dikurniakan cahaya mata pun . Menyerikan lagi alam rumah tangga .

Kahwin muda . Mcm yg diduga , isu nieyh selalu dpt tentangan especially from parents lah kan . Entah jugak . memandangkan aku belum lagi pun menyentuh alam keibubapaan nieyh kan , since aku kahwin pun belum , huhu . so , aku tak dapat sgt nak memahami apa sebenarnya yang ibu and bapa nieyh rasa bila anak diorang yang masih muda belia usulkan nak kahwin awal .

Kenapa sekarang , dlm era yg makin maju nieyh , perkahwinan tu dah jadi mcm satu benda yg rumit pulak . Walhal , kalau zaman dulu ( era mak bapak kita dulu dula lah kan) , diorang sendiri pun kahwin di usia yang muda . Siap diatur oleh keluarga lagi . huhu . Kalau perempuan , umur 12 tahun pun dah disuruh berkahwin . Ye la , kata org tua tua , lagi muda , lagi ramai anak boleh dapat . huhu . Jadi , kenapa zaman sekarang nieyh kebanyakkan ibu bapa mcm melarang anak anak diorang daripada berkahwin awal . I means bukan lah melarang terus , tapi sekadar mcm tak berapa setujuj , mcm tu lah . huhu . susah benor den nak nge explain nyor . haisy!

Personal opinion lah kan , perkahwinan di usia muda or masa masih belajar nieyh tak menjadi hal kalau pasangan tu sendiri pandai menguruskan hal diorang . Perkahwinan tu bkn suatu bebanan tapi tanggungjawab . Ya , mungkin terlalu mentah utk pasangan yg kedua duanya masih mentah nak pikul banyak tanggungjawab dlm satu masa , kan ? tapi , andai perkahwinan tu jln terbaik utk mereka , kenapa mereka perlu tangguh? Perkahwinan tu sendiri sebenarnya membentuk kepada sebuah pembinaan hubungan antara dua insan yang berbeza jantina melalui ikatan yang suci dan diredhai . Sudahnya , kenapa mereka perlu berhubungan dlm keadaan terlarang sedangkan ada nya jalan penyelesaian utk mereka menjalin hubungan dgn cara yg halal ?

Tak semua ibu bapa bersikap begitu . Ada jugak ibu bapa yang memahami tetapi berat hati utk menerima usul anak mereka berkahwin pada usia yg masih muda . Bagi perempuan , rasanya mmg tak ada masalah sgt lah memandangkan kalau melibatkan hal kahwin nieyh , tanggungjawabnya lebih besar pada pihak lelaki . Persiapan wang hantaran , mas kahwin , belanja kenduri dan mcm mcm lagi lah . huhu . Zaman skrg nieyh , hantaran saja dan menjangkau puluhan ribu , sekurang kurangnya RM10 000 . Tak masuk lagi duit nak buat kenduri , kad jemputan , pakaian pengantin . mmg bnyk sgt lah nk pakai duit kn . heee ~

Dalam pada tu jgk , ada kajian di Barat dilakukan dengan isu ni . betul ke pasangan yg berkahwin pada usia muda ni lebih cenderung untuk bercerai?? Tak pasti , tapi itulah hasil kajiannya . Kenapa perlu bercerai . Benarlah kan , segala galanya bergantung kepada penerimaan kita dan cara kita mengendalikan lifestyle kita . Perkahwinan itu umpama mebina masjid . Takkan lah perbuatan suci nak bina masjid pun ada keburukan . Ia bergantung kepada niat kita , penerimaan kita dan cara perlaksanaan kita .

Kalau bina masjid dgn wang haram , maka haram lah jadinya perbuatan tu . Kalau bina masjid atas tanah milik org lain tanpa persetujuan dari empunya , makanya tak baik jugaklah jadinya pembinaan masjid tu . Semua berdasarkan nawaitu kita .